以下是小编帮大家整理的8篇英语美文:假如,欢迎大家分享。
英语经典美文两篇
For Love of Children 给孩子的爱
This slender volume opens with the story of Beniah, an infant rescued by sanitation workers from the stack of garbage in which he had been left to die. Without ever losing sight of Beniah and the too many other deserted children, the author, Sharon Emecz, tells the story of the two homes for abandoned children, Happy Life Kasarani and Happy Life Juja Farm, organized in the area of Nairobi, Kenya. Developed more than a decade ago by two indomitable couples, Sharon and Jim Powell from Delaware in the USA, and Faith and Peter Kamau from Nairobi, the two settings provide the physical and emotional comforts that would otherwise have been denied the 102 abandoned children now living there, as well as having nurtured the many more who have found adoptive homes. More than that even, the two homes have literally saved the lives of all those children. The book provides detail of the structure and functioning of The Happy Life homes allowing for an appreciation of their organization (as well as a pattern for their replication), and provides as well brief portraits of some of the children saved, of those adults who have opted to share a part of their lives with them whether through work or volunteering, and the adoptive parents who have pledged to share their homes and their love with the children who have become their own. Ms. Emecz gives the reader a real sense of the spiritual journey she has undergone in traveling from London to Nairobi, a journey she and her husband, Steve, now make at least annually.
Three Days to See( 节选) 假如给我三天光明
All of us have read thrilling stories in which the hero had only a limited and specified time to live. Sometimes it was as long as a year, sometimes as short as 24 hours. But always we were interested in discovering just how the doomed hero chose to spend his last days or his last hours. I speak, of course, of free men who have a choice, not condemned criminals whose sphere of activities is strictly delimited.
Such stories set us thinking, wondering what we should do under similar circumstances. What events, what experiences, what associations should we crowd into those last hours as mortal beings, what regrets?
Sometimes I have thought it would be an excellent rule to live each day as if we should die tomorrow. Such an attitude would emphasize sharply the values of life. We should live each day with gentleness, vigor and a keenness of appreciation which are often lost when time stretches before us in the constant panorama of more days and months and years to come. There are those, of course, who would adopt the Epicurean motto of “Eat, drink, and be merry”. But most people would be chastened by the certainty of impending death.
In stories the doomed hero is usually saved at the last minute by some stroke of fortune, but almost always his sense of values is changed. He becomes more appreciative of the meaning of life and its permanent spiritual values. It has often been noted that those who live, or have lived, in the shadow of death bring a mellow sweetness to everything they do.
Most of us, however, take life for granted. We know that one day we must die, but usually we picture that day as far in the future. When we are in buoyant health, death is all but unimaginable. We seldom think of it. The days stretch out in an endless vista. So we go about our petty tasks, hardly aware of our listless attitude toward life.
The same lethargy, I am afraid, characterizes the use of all our faculties and senses. Only the deaf appreciate hearing, only the blind realize the manifold blessings that lie in sight. Particularly does this observation apply to those who have lost sight and hearing in adult life. But those who have never suffered impairment of sight or hearing seldom make the fullest use of these blessed faculties. Their eyes and ears take in all sights and sounds hazily, without concentration and with little appreciation. It is the same old story of not being grateful for what we have until we lose it, of not being conscious of health until we are ill.
I have often thought it would be a blessing if each human being were stricken blind and deaf for a few days at some time during his early adult life. Darkness would make him more appreciative of sight; silence would teach him the joys of sound.
英语短篇美文
1、I recently started a new job, in a small office, where four of us share a fridge. In that fridge is a Brita water filter pitcher. One of my coworkers complained the water tasted “dirty”. It went on for a few days, and she was stunned I could drink the water without any trouble. I started to doubt my taste buds, but the water really tasted fine.
最近我找了份新工作,是在一间小办公室里,我们四个人共用一个冰箱。冰箱里有一个Brita牌滤水壶,有一个同事抱怨说水喝起来感觉很“脏”,她连续抱怨了几天,还很震惊我喝这样的水竟然没事。我开始怀疑自己的味蕾出问题了,但我真觉着水喝着还不错。
2、Finally, she figured out the problem was actually her cup. She simply forgot to clean it, and after awhile started to affect the water inside it. She cleaned her cup, and drank the water with no problem.
最后,她发现问题出在了她的杯子上,她只是忘了刷杯子,过一段时间就影响里面水的味道了。她把杯子洗干净了,水就没有异味了。
3、I can't help but think about the world we live in. Too often we quickly blame other people, other things, anything else but ourselves. “You're racist”. “You're intolerant”. “You're the problem”. The world isn't perfect, I know, but I think we should take a step back sometimes and ask ourselves some tough questions.
我禁不住思考了我们生活的世界,我们总是急于责备其他人、其他事、除了自己之外的.一切东西。“你有种族歧视”、“你太狭隘”、“是你的问题”,我知道世界并不完美,但我认为有时我们应该退一步,问自己几个很难回答的问题。
4、Can I be better? Is my heart really pure? Can I help this situation with kindness?
我能变得更好吗?我的心真的纯洁吗?我能带着善意解决问题吗?
5、If not to the sun for smiling, warm is still in the sun there, but wewill laugh more confident calm; if turned to found his own shadow, appropriate escape, the sun will be through the heart,warm each place behind the corner; if an outstretched palm cannot fall butterfly, then clenched waving arms, given power; if I can't have bright smile, it will face to the sunshine, and sunshine smile together, in full bloom.
中文:如果不向太阳索取微笑,温暖仍在太阳那里,但我们会笑得更加自信从容;如果转过身去发现了自己的影子,适当的躲让,阳光便可穿越心灵,温暖每一处身后的角落;如果摊开的掌心不能点落蝴蝶,那就紧握成拳挥动臂膀,给予力量;如果我不能够微笑得灿烂,那就将脸投向灿烂的阳光,与阳光一起微笑,烂漫。
今天跟大家推荐一篇经典美文:如何在失败中找到快乐,希望你会喜欢。
The introduction to a self-help book is almost always a spoiler: In the chapters that follow, you, the reader, will learn how to get a promotion, make a better first impression, save your marriage, or lower your cholesterol. This will lead to happiness.
一本自助类图书的序言几乎总会吐露出书中的讯息:在接下来的章节中,作为读者的你将学习如何获得晋升,给人留下更好的第一印象,挽救婚姻或降低胆固醇的技巧,本书将为你铺就一条通往幸福的康庄大道云云。
The Antidote diverges from this theme. In the first chapter, author Oliver Burkeman explains that after years of reporting on the field of psychology, he has concluded that “the effort to try to feel happy is often precisely the thing that makes us miserable.” Armed with this thesis, Burkeman sets out to explore various alternatives to this effort, which he calls the negative paths to happiness.
但《解毒剂:无法忍受积极思维的人如何获得幸福》( The Antidote: Happiness For People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking)一书与这类主题背道而驰。在第一章中,作者奥利弗伯克曼解释称,在从事了多年心理学领域的报道之后,他得出了一项结论:“很多情况下,为获得幸福感而付出的努力恰恰使我们陷入痛苦之中。”秉持这个观点,伯克曼着手探索各种不同于这种努力的替代方案,他将其称为通往幸福的消极路径。
He asks questions. Are these negative paths too extreme for the average person to implement? Can a successful reorientation to a negative path be achieved gradually (I will try to accept humiliation as inevitable), or does it have to be sudden and drastic (I will actively humiliate myself, over and over, in order to diminish my ego)?
他问了一些问题。于普通人而言,这些消极路径是否太过极端,以至于难以付诸行动?成功地重新定位至一条消极路径能否逐步实施(被人羞辱估计是不可避免的,我已准备好了)?它是否肯定会是突然而剧烈的(我将积极且反复地羞辱我自己,以减少我的自我意识)?
The Antidote has been reviewed several times over the course of the past few months. In an effort to separate my review from the others, I'm tempted to talk about myself. Like many recent college graduates working as underpaid interns, I sometimes feel out-of-sorts. Reading this book on my morning commute convinced me that failure is both inevitable and beneficial. But to dwell on my personal circumstances would be to fall into a trap that this book manages, effortlessly, to avoid.
过去几个月以来,媒体上已经出现了多篇与《解毒剂》一书有关的书评。为了使我的这篇书评展现出不一样的特色,我想先谈谈我自己。一如许多刚刚走出校门,从事待遇微薄的实习生工作的大学生,我有时心情很差,总想发脾气。在早上上班途中读完这本书后,我确信,失败不仅是难以避免的,也是有益的。但过分沉溺于自身处境,将落入本书试图以毫不费力的方式设法避免的陷阱之中。
In a chapter titled “The Hidden Benefits of Insecurity, ” Burkeman describes the human tendency to avoid insecurity and uncertainty at all costs. “But in chasing all that, ” he adds, “we close down the very faculties that permit the happiness we crave.” Here you might expect Burkeman to discuss the time he took an unfulfilling job that promised economic security, or the time he turned down a trip to Spain because he didn't speak Spanish. Instead he quotes the 20th century Catholic monk and mystic Thomas Merton, author of The Seven Story Mountain: “The truth that many people never understand, is that the more you try to avoid suffering, the more you suffer, because smaller and more insignificant things begin to torture you.” Burkeman speaks to his audience in a way that establishes trust. He is a dutiful researcher and a listener. He quotes experts.
在“不安全的潜在好处”(The Hidden Benefits of Insecurity)这个章节中,伯克曼描述了人类不惜一切代价,竭力避免不安全感和不确定性的倾向。“但在追逐所有这些目标的过程中,”他补充说。“我们恰恰关闭了那种使我们渴望的幸福成为可能的官能。”读到此处,你或许预期伯克曼将讨论他的过往经历:他从事过一份不称心、但应该会带来经济安全感的工作,也曾由于不会说西班牙语而放弃一个去西班牙旅行的机会。但他没有。他引用了20世纪天主教僧侣、《七层山》(The Seven Story Mountain)一书作者、神秘的托马斯默顿的一段话:“一个许多人怎么也搞不明白的事实是,越竭力避免受苦,就会遭受越多的苦难,因为一些更加琐碎且微不足道的事情会开始折磨你。”伯克曼以一种能够建立信任感的方式与他的听众沟通。他是一位尽职的研究者,一位倾听者。他所引述的,是专家的意见。
This is how we get to know Burkeman -- as a curious journalist rooting around for an argument, not as a born-again guru who uses his own story of suffering and healing to prove the validity of his personal brand of self-improvement. In each chapter he sits down with someone who has dedicated his or her professional life to exploring a particular negative path to happiness. He punctuates each interview with clear prose about human traits that make a negative path to happiness difficult to adopt. For example, in a chapter on methods for embracing failure, he writes bluntly that “perfectionism, at bottom, is fear-driven striving … [at] its extremes, it is an exhausting and permanently stressful way to live.”
这正是我们了解伯克曼的方式:他是一位好奇心重、四处翻找论据的记者,而不是一位重生的大师――他讲述了自己陷入和摆脱痛苦的经历,以此证明他所宣扬的自我改善方式的确有效。他在每个章节中都讲述了一个人的故事,这些人毕其职业生涯,探求一条通往幸福的消极路径。每次访谈中,他总是以清晰的文笔凸显那些使得通往幸福的消极路径难以付诸行动的人性特点。比如,在一个论述如何坦然接受失败的章节中,他直言不讳地写道:“完美主义,究其根本而言,是一种受恐惧感驱动的抗争。往极端里说,它是一种使人筋疲力尽,时刻让人承受重压的生活方式。”
In the chapter on the danger of setting too many goals, Burkeman recounts meeting a man named Steve Shapiro in a bar in the West Village. Shapiro is a consultant who travels around the country hosting self-help seminars for business audiences. Unlike most consultants, Shapiro preaches against goal setting. He found this calling at a time when his obsession with career advancement had ruined his marriage. He argues that once you abandon the five-year-plan approach to life and business, you immediately have more focus and energy for the present moment. Pretty soon you are spending more time with your family and performing better at work.
在论述设定太多目标所导致的危险性的章节中,伯克曼讲述了一位咨询师的故事。这位名叫史蒂夫夏皮罗的咨询师是他在西村(West Village,西村是具有反叛精神的各类先锋艺术家的汇聚之地――译注)一家酒吧中遇到的。夏皮罗经常在美国各地主持各类以商界人士为受众、探讨如何自助的研讨会。不同于大多数咨询师,夏皮罗建议职场人士不要为自己设定太多的目标。夏皮罗因为过于迷恋职务晋升、最终导致破裂之后悟出了这个道理。他声称,一旦放弃你为自己的人生和事业设定的5年规划,你就会马上把更多的注意力和精力放在当下的事务上。很快,你就可以花更多的时间与家人在一起,你的工作表现也将大有改观。
Run through the rain
雨中的记忆
She had been shopping with her Mom in Wal-Mart. She must have been 6 years old, this beautiful brown haired, freckle-faced image of innocence. It was pouring outside. The kind of rain that gushes over the top of rain gutters, so much in a hurry to hit the Earth, it has no time to flow down the spout.
她和妈妈刚在沃尔玛结束购物。这个天真的小女孩应该6岁大了,头发是美丽的棕色,脸上有雀斑。外面下着倾盆大雨。雨水溢满了檐槽,来不及排走,就迫不及待地涌涨上地面。
We all stood there under the awning and just inside the door of the Wal-Mart. We all waited, some patiently, others irritated, because nature messed up their hurried day. I am always mesmerized by rainfall. I get lost in the sound and sight of the heavens washing away the dirt and dust of the world. Memories of running, splashing so carefree as a child come pouring in as a welcome reprieve from the worries of my day.
我们都站在沃尔玛门口的遮篷下。大家都在等待,有人很耐心,有人很烦躁,因为老天在给他们本已忙碌的一天添乱。雨天总引起我的遐思。我出神地听着、看着老天冲刷洗涤这世界的污垢和尘埃,孩时无忧无虑地在雨中奔跑玩水的记忆汹涌而至,暂时缓解了我一天的焦虑。
Her voice was so sweet as it broke the hypnotic trance we were all caught in, “Mom, let's run through the rain.“ she said.
小女孩甜美的声音打破了这令人昏昏欲睡的气氛,“妈妈,我们在雨里跑吧。”她说。
”What?“ Mom asked.
“什么?”母亲问。
”Let's run through the rain!“ She repeated.
“我们在雨里跑吧,”她重复。
”No, honey. We'll wait until it slows down a bit.“ Mom replied.
“不,亲爱的,我们等雨小一点再走。”母亲回答说。
This young child waited about another minute and repeated: ”Mom, let's run through the rain.“
过了一会小女孩又说:“妈妈,我们跑出去吧。”
”We'll get soaked if we do.“ Mom said.
“这样的话我们会湿透的。”母亲说。
”No, we won't, Mom. That's not what you said this morning,“ the young girl said as she tugged at her Mom's arm.”
“不会的,妈妈。你今天早上不是这样说的。”小女孩一边说一边拉着母亲的手。
“This morning? When did I say we could run through the rain and not get wet?”
“今天早上?我什么时候说过我们淋雨不会湿啊?”
“Don't you remember? When you were talking to Daddy about his cancer, you said, If God can get us through this, he can get us through anything!”
“你不记得了吗?你和爸爸谈他的癌症时,你不是说‘如果上帝让我们闯过这一关,那我们就没有什么过不去。’”
The entire crowd stopped dead silent. I swear you couldn't hear anything but the rain. We all stood silently. No one came or left in the next few minutes. Mom paused and thought for a moment about what she would say.
人群一片寂静。我发誓,除了雨声,你什么都听不到。我们都静静地站着。接下来的几分钟没有一个人走动。母亲停了一下,想着应该说些什么。
Now some would laugh it off and scold her for being silly. Some might even ignore what was said. But this was a moment of affirmation in a young child's life. Time when innocent trust can be nurtured so that it will bloom into faith. “Honey, you are absolutely right. Let's run through the rain. If get wet, well maybe we just needed washing.” Mom said. Then off they ran.
有人也许会对此一笑了之,或者责备这孩子的不懂事,有人甚至不把她的话放在心上。但这却是一个小孩子一生中需要被肯定的时候。若受到鼓舞,此时孩子单纯的信任就会发展成为坚定的信念。“亲爱的,你说得对,我们跑过去吧。如果淋湿了,那也许是因为我们的确需要冲洗一下了。”母亲说。然后她们就冲出去了。
We all stood watching, smiling and laughing as they darted past the cars and. They held their shopping bags over their heads just in case. They got soaked. But they were followed by a few who screamed and laughed like children all the way to their cars. And yes, I did. I ran. I got wet. I needed washing.Circumstances or people can take away your material possessions, they can take away your money, and they can take away your health. But no one can ever take away your precious memories. So, don't forget to make time and take the opportunities to make memories every day!
我们站在那里,笑着看她们飞快地跑过停着的汽车。她们把购物袋高举过头想挡挡雨,但还是湿透了。好几个人像孩子般尖叫着,大笑着,也跟着冲了出去,奔向自己的车子。
当然,我也这样做了,跑了出去,淋湿了。我也需要接受洗礼。环境或其他人可以夺去你的物质财富,抢走你的金钱,带走你的健康,但没有人可以带走你珍贵的回忆。因此,记得要抓紧时间,抓住机会每天都给自己留下一些回忆吧
To everything there is a season and a time to every purpose under heaven. I hope you still take the time to run through the rain.
世间万物皆有自己的季节,做任何事情也有一个恰当的时机。希望你有机会在雨中狂奔一回。
2 一封特殊的信
Dear World:
亲爱的`世界:
My son starts school today.
我的儿子今天就要开始上学读书了。
It's going to be strange and new to him for a while, and I wish you would sort of treat him gently.
一时之间,他会感觉陌生而又新鲜。我希望你能待他温柔一些。
You see, up to now, he's been king of the roost.
你明白,到现在为止,他一直是家中的小皇帝。
He's been boss of the backyard.
一直是后院的王者。
I have always been around to repair his wounds, and to soothe his feelings.
我一直在他身旁,忙着为他治疗伤口,哄他开心。
But now--things are going to be different.
但是现在--一切都将不同了。
This morning, he's going to walk down the front steps, wave his hand and start on his great adventure that will probably include wars and tragedy and sorrow.
今天清晨,他就要走下前门的楼梯,冲我挥手,然后开始他的伟大的历险征程,其间或许有争斗、不幸以及伤痛。
To live his life in the world he has to live in will require faith and love and courage.
既然活在这个世上,他就需要信念、爱心和勇气。
So, World, I wish you would sort of take him by his young hand and teach him the things he will have to know.
所以,世界啊,我希望你能够时不时握住他稚嫩的小手,传授他所应当知晓的事情。
Teach him - but gently, if you can.
教育他吧--而如果可能的话,温柔一些。
Teach him that for every scoundrel there is a hero; that for every crooked politician there is a dedicated leader; that for every enemy there is a friend.
教他知道,每有恶人之地,必有豪杰所在;每有奸诈小人,必有献身义士;每见一敌人,必有一友在侧。
Teach him the wonders of books.
教他感受书本的神奇魅力。
Give him quiet time to ponder the eternal mystery of birds in the sky, bees in the sun, and flowers on the green hill.
给他时间静思大自然中亘古绵传之奥秘:空中的飞鸟,日光里的蜜蜂,青山上的簇簇繁花。
Teach him it is far more honorable to fail than to cheat.
教他知道,失败远比欺骗更为光荣。
Teach him to have faith in his own ideas, even if everyone tells him they are wrong.
教他坚定自我的信念,哪怕人人予以否认。
Teach him to sell his brawn and brains to the highest bidder, but never to put a price on his heart and soul.
教他可以最高价付出自己的精力和智慧,但绝不可出卖良心和灵魂。
Teach him to close his ears to a howling mob...and to stand and fight if he thinks he's right.
教他置暴徒的喧嚣于度外……并在自觉正确之时挺身而战。
Teach him gently, World, but don't coddle him, because only the test of fire makes fine steel.
温柔地教导他吧,世界,但是不要放纵他,因为只有烈火的考验才能炼出真钢。
This is a big order, World, but see what you can do.
这一要求甚高,世界,但是请尽你所能。
He's such a nice little fellow.
他是一个如此可爱的小家伙。
装满吻的盒子
The story goes that some time ago, a man punished his 3-year-old daughter for wasting a roll of gold wrapping paper. Money was tight and he became infuriated when the child tried to decorate a box to put under the Christmas tree. Nevertheless, the little girl brought the gift to her father the next morning and said, “This is for you, Daddy.”
有这样一个故事,爸爸因为三岁的女儿浪费了一卷金色的包装纸而惩罚了她。家里很缺钱,当孩子想要用包装纸装饰一个挂在圣诞树上的盒子时,爸爸生气了。然而,第二天早上小女孩把盒子作为礼物送给了爸爸,“这是给你的,爸爸。”
The man was embarrassed by his earlier overreaction, but his anger flared again when he found out the box was empty. He yelled at her, stating, ”Don't you know, when you give someone a present, there is supposed to be something inside? The little girl looked up at him with tears in her eyes and cried, “Oh, Daddy, it's not empty at all. I blew kisses into the box. They're all for you, Daddy.”
女儿的这个行为让爸爸感到尴尬。但是当他发现盒子是空的时候,他的怒火再一次燃烧了。他对女儿喊道,“难道你不知道给别人礼物的时候,里面应该放有东西吗?”多女孩抬头看着父亲,眼里含着泪水,“爸爸,盒子不是空的。我把吻放在了盒子里,都是给你的,爸爸。”
【坠入爱河后的22条无法避免规律】
1. In the beginning, your life starts feeling really dramatic.
1. 一开始,你的生活变得紧张刺激。
2. And then, suddenly, much less so.
2. 但一段时间后,生活忽然又回归平淡。
3. You and your S.O. develop pet names that aren’t necessarily cutesy but are definitely unique.
3. 你们会创造出两人的亲密昵称,不一定很肉麻,但绝对独一无二。
4. Ditto inside jokes that probably alienate anyone else you hang out with.
4. 你一直重复讲只有你们俩听懂的笑话,这往往令曾经的玩伴疏远你。
5. If you hear love songs on the radio, they no longer make you roll your eyes.
5. 如果听到电台情歌,你不再流露出不屑的表情。
6. And if you watch romantic movies, you’re like, “Oh, I get it now!”
6. 如果看浪漫的爱情片,你会恍然大悟:“哦,我现在明白了!”
7. Everywhere you go, you notice little things that remind you of them, so you have to keep yourself from buying hundreds of random gifts.
7. 无论去哪里,总有一些小东西让你不自觉想到对方,所以只好不断买各种礼物。
8. You send each other pictures of animal pairs with the caption, “Us”.
8. 彼此发动物情侣的照片,然后配上图片说明――“我们”。
9. You have their picture set as background or lock screen (or BOTH!) on your phone.
9. 你把对方的照片设置为手机的背景或锁屏(或两者皆是)。
10. You don’t care so much about going out anymore, and you may have gone through a period in which your friends questioned whether you were even still alive.
10. 你不会格外在意外出,以致朋友也许会在某段时间质疑你是否还活着。
11. There’s a lot of non-sexy naked time.
11.很多时候想要裸体,不过跟性感无关。
12. You spend a lot of time together in silence, but that’s totally chill.
12. 你们在一起时经常默默不语,但气氛并不尴尬。
13. Their interests or hobbies become yours, and vice versa.
13. 对方的兴趣爱好渐渐融入你的生活,反之亦然。
14. Or they don’t, but you still tolerate them on occasion.
14. 即使你不喜欢那些兴趣爱好,也时常愿意去理解包容。
15. You actually DO think of them first thing in the morning, even on the days you don’t wake up next to each other.
15. 每天睁开眼睛就会想起对方,即使你们分隔两地。
16. You eat. A lot.
16. 你会胃口大开。
17. You find the simplest things adorable, as long as your S.O. is doing them.
17. 你发现,只要是“某人”正在做的事,不管多么平常,总是那么可爱。
18. You hide certain bodily functions for as long as possible, until one day a fart or burp sneaks out and all bets are off.
18. 你会尽量隐藏某些身体机能,直到有一天不小心放屁或打嗝,让你的努力白费。
19. You actually miss them even if you’re just apart for a few hours.
19. 分离不过几小时就开始思念对方。
20. You plan fantasy trips around the world, because suddenly everything just seems more interesting..
20. 计划着到世界各地旅行,因为忽然间你对一切事物都兴趣盎然。
21. And maaaaybe you envision your future life together in your dream house with your beautiful dogs and/or children, if that’s what you’re into.
21. 也许,你会幻想未来与宠物、子女一起生活在梦想之家,如果那是你所向往的。
22. You get that you’d find most of this stuff so gross and annoying in anyone else, but when it’s you guys, it just makes sense.
22. 别人做的那些令人反感或恼怒的事,当你们去经历时,就变得意义非凡。
【爱情,在婚姻的殿堂中成长】
Social scientists have observed that marriages typically move through a series of at least four stages. Each stage presents unique learning opportunities and blessings, along with challenges and obstacles.
社会学家研究发现,一般来说,婚姻至少要经历一系列的至少四个阶段。每个阶段都给予我们独特的学习和成长的机会,还有祝福。当然,其中不乏挑战和险阻。
Stage One C Romance, Passion and Promise
第一阶段――浪漫,激情,承诺
In the beginning of a relationship partners often communicate effortlessly and at length. They seem to intuit each other’s needs and wishes and go out of their way to please and surprise each other. Couples begin to develop a strong sense of “we.”
在一段婚姻关系初期,夫妻们经常可以毫不费力地进行最大限度的沟通。他们可以直接感知对方的愿望和需求,也会不顾自己的感受尽力取悦对方,让对方惊喜。他们之间逐渐建立起“我们”的强烈意识,纵观所有阶段,此阶段夫妻的个性差异是最小的,几乎可以忽略。
Individual differences are minimized, if noticed at all; partners are very accepting. Joy, excitement, happiness and hope abound.
夫妻在这个阶段很容易接受对方的一切。他们彼此充满着快乐、兴奋、幸福和希望。
Partners present and elicit their best selves. Life seems promising. It is a time of sharing dreams and romance. This is a time to be remembered and cherished.
夫妻们都会选择展现他们最好的那一面给对方。生活似乎充满希望和前景。这是彼此分享梦想和浪漫的阶段。这是值得铭记和珍惜的阶段。
Stage Two C Settling down and Realization
第二阶段――冷静和理解
The high energy and intensity of Stage One inevitably give way to the ordinary and routine.
第一阶段的热情和激情不可避免地被随之而来的生活琐事所磨灭。
Ideally, in Stage Two couples learn to deepen their communication skills. They work to understand and express their wants, needs, and feelings.
在理想的情况下,在第二阶段,夫妻倾向于加强他们的沟通技巧。他们要学习慢慢地理解和表达他们真正的需求、感觉和希望。
They learn to be honest and vulnerable and to listen actively to each other.
他们要学习坦诚,要愿意展现自己脆弱的一面给对方,还要多倾听对方的意见。
They become aware of differences not noticed previously and develop strategies for dealing with them. Couples learn about give and take, negotiation and accommodation.
他们会发现一些之前没有留意到的差异,并利用适当的策略好好处理因差异造成的影响。双方在这个阶段学习如何付出和接受、商量和妥协。
Stage Three C Rebellion and Power Struggles
第三阶段――反抗和权力抗争
Spouses cannot always live up to each other’s expectations. They will disappoint and unintentionally hurt each other.
夫妻关系中没有人总能满足对方的期盼。不经意间,他们会使对方失望,甚至伤害到对方。
They now become intensely aware of their differences and may use control strategies to bring back the desired balance.
在这阶段,他们强烈地意识到两人之间的差异,并希望能控制局势,让生活回到以前理想的平衡状态。
Power struggles are common. Blame, judgment, criticism and defensiveness are likely outcomes.
权力抗争是很常见的;指责,批评,挑剔,防御,是最有可能的结果。
Fear and anxiety enter the relationship. Couples’ thinking can narrow into right/wrong, good/bad polarities.
婚姻关系混进了恐惧和担忧,夫妻的思想很可能会缩窄到对/错,好/坏两个极端。
Ideally, couples learn about forgiveness and accommodation in this stage. They learn to deal constructively with anger and hurt. A supportive community becomes especially important.
理想的情况下,在此阶段,夫妻会在体谅和适应中成长。支撑性的社群变得尤为重要(即亲戚好友要帮助夫妻维持婚姻,给予支撑性的建议,让争吵中的夫妻变得和谐)。
Stage Four C Discovery, Reconciliation, and Beginning Again
第四阶段――发现,调解,重新开始
Couples can push through the previous stage through deepened communication, honesty and trust.
夫妻可以跳过第三阶段这道坎,但需要加深彼此的沟通,坦诚和信任。
Ideally, they discover and create a new sense of connection. They learn more about each other’s strengths and vulnerabilities.
在理想的情况下,他们会探寻并创造出一种新的维系婚姻的方式。
They learn to identify and talk about their fears instead of acting them out. They refuse to judge or blame their partner; they translate their complaints into requests for change.
他们学会要了解更多对方的长处和弱点。他们学会试图说出他们心中的恐惧,而不是直接表现在行动上以致伤害对方。他们不再批评或指责对方,而将对方的抱怨视为让自己变得更好的要求。
Partners see each other in a new light, as gifted and flawed, just as they themselves are gifted and flawed. Empathy and compassion increase. They learn to appreciate and respect each other in new ways; they learn not to take each other for granted.
夫妻用一种新的眼光看待对方,就如同自己本身有优点也有缺点,对方也亦然。因此,他们对对方的同情感和怜悯感增加了。他们学会以一种新的方法去赞美和尊重对方,不再认为对自己好是对方的义务。
They find a new balance of separateness and togetherness, independence and intimacy. A new hope and energy return to the relationship.
他们发现了一种在分开和共处之间,独立和亲密之间的平衡。婚姻关系重新注入新的希望和力量。
Additional Challenges and Stages
其他挑战和阶段
Many couples will encounter additional life cycle stages. Just like marriage, creating a family will face many challenges.
很多夫妻会遇到其他阶段。如同婚姻,建立一个家庭会面对很多挑战。
It is another opportunity to learn about cooperation and becoming a team, about dealing with differences and conflicts, and about taking time to pause and choose.
这给予夫妻另一个成长的机会,学习如何成为一个团队,分工合作;处理生活上的矛盾和争执;留出时间去思考未来的路,并进行抉择。
Parenting is a spiritual journey that involves not only the growth of the children but the growth of the parents. Like marriage, it will have many opportunities to surrender and die to self, to let go and to grieve.
成为父母是一个心灵上新的旅程,期间不断发育成长的不仅有孩子,而且父母也会壮大他们的力量,思想更加成熟。如同婚姻,成为父母也要很大牺牲,要懂取舍和放弃。
Other life cycle challenges include illness, unemployment and other financial crises, retirement, and the death of one’s partner. Many couples must take care of the older generation while letting go of the younger one.
夫妻会遇到的其他挑战还包括疾病,失业或其他经济危机,退休和另一半的离世。有时候,夫妻还要面对白头人送黑头人的情况。
Growth throughout the marital journey requires openness and flexibility. Faith requires trust and surrender. Even if we cannot see the entire road and where it will end, we need to have clarity to take the next few steps.
在婚姻的旅程中,爱情的成长需要坦诚和适应。信念需要信任和退让来维持。尽管我们未必能遇见前方的道路,也不知何处是幸福的彼岸,我们仍然需要清晰的指导,引领未来的生活。
The significant inscription found on an old key---“If I rest, I rust”---would be an excellent motto for those who are afflicted with the slightest bit of idleness. Even the most industrious person might adopt it with advantage to serve as a reminder that, if one allows his faculties to rest, like the iron in the unused key, they will soon show signs of rust and, ultimately, cannot do the work required of them.
Those who would attain the heights reached and kept by great men must keep their faculties polished by constant use, so that they may unlock the doors of knowledge, the gate that guard the entrances to the professions, to science, art, literature, agriculture---every department of human endeavor.
Industry keeps bright the key that opens the treasury of achievement. If Hugh Miller, after toiling all day in a quarry, had devoted his evenings to rest and recreation, he would never have become a famous geologist. The celebrated mathematician, Edmund Stone, would never have published a mathematical dictionary, never have found the key to science of mathematics, if he had given his spare moments to idleness, had the little Scotch lad, Ferguson, allowed the busy brain to go to sleep while he tended sheep on the hillside instead of calculating the position of the stars by a string of beads, he would never have become a famous astronomer.
Labor vanquishes all---not inconstant, spasmodic, or ill-directed labor; but faithful, unremitting, daily effort toward a well-directed purpose. Just as truly as eternal vigilance is the price of liberty, so is eternal industry the price of noble and enduring success.
译文:
There are many apple trees in a garden. They’re good friends. One day an old tree is ill. There are many pests in the tree. Leaves of the tree turn yellow. The old tree feels very sad and unwell. Another tree sends for a doctor for him. At first, they send for a pigeon, but she has no idea about it. Then they send for an oriole, and she can’t treat the old tree well. Then they send for a woodpecker. She is a good doctor. She pecks a hole in the tree and eats lots of pests. At last the old tree becomes better and better. Leaves turn green and green.
Today is Sunday! On Sundays, I usually play the flute.My father usually reads the newspaper. My motherusuallycleansthe house. Buttoday my mother is in bed. She is ill. My father has to do the housework. Now, he is cleaning the house. “Sam, can you help me?” “Yes, Dad!” Now, we’re washing the car. Where’s my sister, Amy? She is playing my flute. What a lucky girl!